A Gift for the Dad Who Has Everything

#1 GENIUS DAD

Growing up with the Genius Dad was hard, mainly because of his high expectations, but also because having a high IQ and Dad humor is a terrible combination. You thought having him around to help with schoolwork would be a godsend, but you stopped asking for help after he once re-wrote your assignment, then proceeded to get your teacher fired when she gave a grade of an A-. His skills include fluency in five languages, reciting Pi to 50 decimals, and being better than you at everything you ever cared about.

FAVORITE DAD JOKE

The past, the present and the future all walked into a bar. It was tense.

WHY HE NEEDS SOCKS THAT EDUCATE KIDS

Don’t disappoint Genius Dad this Father’s Day. Usually your gifts are ‘superfluous, not thoughtful enough, or just plain boring.’ This year get him something that gives to those in need (he's morally obliged to like it). Obviously no man can ever have too many great socks, but you'll get bonus points because they donate books to schoolchildren in their efforts to become smart like him. And to top it off, they're made with organic cotton in Fair Trade conditions, so there is literally no way he can fault them. Shop socks that donate books now. He'll still disapprove of your career choice though.

#2 DO GOODER DAD

Like the Genius Dad, you'll never be on the same level as the Do-Gooder Dad, but that's ok. You're just happy to be related. When you were but an infant, Do-Gooder Dad scaled the Annapurna mountain peaks to donate his blood marrow through a bic pen to save the life of a Nepalese orphan. He met your mother after he dove off a 50m cliff into arctic waters to save her floundering beagle pup. And growing up, he always showed up to your soccer games and dance recitals. On time. All of them.

FAVORITE DAD JOKE

Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.

WHY HE NEEDS SOCKS THAT TREAT HIV

Because even if you gave him organic cotton socks made in Fair Trade conditions that plant trees, donate books and feed hungry kids, you'd still feel you would have fallen short. I mean, this moral lighthouse of a man founded three separate organizations that did those things before he was 20. But giving him socks that provide lifesaving HIV treatment to pregnant mothers, preventing the transmission of the disease to their children, and ensure their mother's continue to stay healthy - even Do-Gooder Dad will be impressed with that.

#3 FOODIE DAD

You would think buying gifts for Foodie Dad would be easy - food related stuff, right? Au contraire. Kitchen utensils - he owns every one created by mankind since 500 AD. Restaurant outings - he’s been everywhere ‘worthwhile’ in the country 10 times, and you were told that unless it was El Bulli not to bother. Cooking lessons - last time he narrowly avoided a knife in the ribs after he vaulted the counter to demonstrate proper flaying technique to Gordon Ramsay. When it comes to Foodie Dad and gifts, one must tread carefully.

FAVORITE DAD JOKE

What if soy milk is just regular milk introducing itself in Spanish?

WHY HE NEEDS SOCKS THAT FEED KIDS

When considering Father's Day gifts for Foodie Dad, 'the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’ holds true. The only way to temporarily distract him from the Food Network marathon is to remind him that enjoying smoked quail eggs and parsley jelly is not actually an option for everyone. By gifting him organic cotton socks that give therapeutic food packs to malnourished kids, it ensures that:

1) Your gift will be joyfully accepted given their food related theme.

2) Foodie Dad will be comfortable during his three month wait for a table at Noma.

3) Supporting amazing humanitarian organizations like Action Against Hunger will make Foodie Dad feel less guilty about spending your family’s superannuation on appetizers.

#4 AQUA DAD

During your fifth grade excursion to Disneyland, your Dad always pulled you away from the spinning teacups and towards the water rides. Because "more water for your kids" was his family vacation motto. Somehow, Aqua Dad always found a way to avoid the lines and take a dunk in the wave pool. And of course he stressed the importance of hydration until you couldn't drink anymore. This is Aqua Dad.

FAVORITE DAD JOKE

Q: What kind of stroke can you use on toast?

A: BUTTER-fly!

WHY HE NEEDS SOCKS THAT PROVIDE SAFE WATER

Because not only is this Dad a 3 time gold medalist at the Olympics in freestyle, a seasoned lifeguard at Laguna Beach and the undefeated champion at the Imaginary Hydration Festival, but his aqua filled heart wants to fill other's lives with the awesomeness of H20. Socks for water provide 18 months of safe, drinkable, water for someone in need, which not only makes Aqua Dad happy, but make him proud that you know him so well. Gift him socks for clean water, and you can guarantee your next trip to Disneyland will go swimmingly. He'll be so fond of his socks that he'll be riding rollercoasters for cameos of his socks rather than waterslides.

THE GIFT FOR THE DAD WHO IS ALL OF THESE THINGS

So, your Dad is all of these things...

This Father's Day, go above and beyond for your Dad and the planet he loves so dearly. Each Conscious Collection provides 18 months of safe water, 7 days of HIV therapy for an expectant mother, 6 meals for malnourished kids, and 2 schoolbooks for kids in the native language.

 


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